I’m so excited to welcome Samantha Decker to Threshold today as part of my series Beyond the Labels, where we’re exploring the parts of our stories that don’t fit neatly into the boxes or labels the world gives us.
Samantha is a Bible teacher, speaker, and the author of Unhurried, whose work reflects a deep heart for helping believers grow in their love for Jesus through intentional discipleship and a deep grounding in Scripture.
She has encouraged countless women through her teaching and writing at samanthadeckerwrites.com where she shares reflections on faith, motherhood, and spiritual growth.
Samantha lives in Oklahoma with her husband, Dustin, and their four young children. I’ve personally been impacted by her steady faith and her passion for raising up the next generation of believers through ordinary, faithful mentorship. You can connect with her on Instagram @samanthadeckerwrites or by subscribing to her newsletter at samanthadeckerwrites.com or follow along on Substack.
I hope you enjoy her words as much as I do.
Intimidated, I slowly stepped over the threshold and walked into my friend’s house. I looked around and saw toys scattered about the living room, a full laundry basket in the corner, and remnants of lunch on the table. I didn’t know what I had expected, but it wasn’t this.
My friend was older—a wife, mom, and leader in our church. She always seemed to have it all together. On the other hand, I was a freshman in college, just trying to figure out what life on my own looked like.
However, as we sat at her crumb-filled kitchen table and talked about life and the Lord, my intimidation melted away. I was encouraged by her vulnerability and willingness to invest in my life. There was nothing magical, planned, or flashy about that afternoon coffee, but its impact on my life was profound. I tangibly saw the effects of intentionally investing in others.
In church circles, we tend to pick up the label “mentor” or “mentee” based on age, appearances of maturity, or life circumstances. And sometimes, our lack of experience or qualifications can make us feel disqualified from stepping into mentorship. However, I don’t think this is what Scripture lays out for us when we examine the roles of mentors and mentees.
Investing in others isn’t just good—it’s biblical. Paul laid out this command in Titus 2:3–5:
“Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good, and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled.”
Throughout Scripture, we see instructions to pass down the Word of God from one generation to the next (Deuteronomy 6:6–7, Psalm 145:4, 2 Timothy 2:1–2, and more). However, as Paul wrote to Titus, he provided greater detail on just how to do this—through teaching and training.
Teaching
In verse 3, Paul writes that older women are to “teach what is good.” As the early church was growing and developing, teaching sound doctrine was imperative. Today, we must take the same approach.
In a teaching relationship, there are (at least) two people: 1. The teacher and 2. The student. And there are two steps: 1. Knowing (through both study and experience) and 2. Passing it on.
Older women—both in age and spiritual maturity—have a responsibility to step into this role. We must gain biblical knowledge and understanding, and then find students (a.k.a. women willing to sit at our messy dinner tables) to teach.
Training
Additionally, older women are to train younger women.
When someone trains for a marathon, they typically put together a training program, monitor their food intake, exercise regularly, and find a coach or running group to spur them on. Spiritual training is similar.
Training goes beyond the “how-to” and steps into “watch and join me.” This involves inviting younger women into your life to see what living as a godly woman, wife, mother, friend, and/or employee looks like.
As a younger woman sees you practice self-control during your teenager’s act of rebellion, she will remember to practice the same self-control during her toddler’s temper tantrum. And as she sees the way you love and serve others, her godly desire to do the same will grow.
Mentor or Mentee?
So, how do we know if we are the older or younger woman? The mentor or the mentee? The teacher or the student? Which label should we wear? As believers, the answer is: we are both. At every stage of life, we need intentional relationships with both younger and older women for the purpose of sanctification and mutual encouragement (Romans 1:12).
My friend could’ve easily made excuses for not investing in my life. She was a young mom juggling toddlers and infants, she had responsibilities at our church and in our community, and I’m sure she had a to-do list a mile long. But she didn’t make excuses—she invested in a college student, and it made an eternal impact. She helped me see I wasn’t just a mentee; I, too, could mentor those coming up behind me.
Who do you need to invest in? Is there an older, godly woman in your life who you could ask to get lunch with? Is there a younger woman the Lord has placed on your heart who you could invite over? Maybe today’s the day to reach out.
You are more than a mentee and more than a mentor. In Christ, you are fully equipped. Walk forward in this truth, bearing the only label worthy of wearing: “Holy to the Lord.”
Thank you again, Samantha, for sharing your words with us here! I hope her story reminds you that you don’t need to have it all together to make an eternal impact — and that mentorship often starts with simply inviting someone into your ordinary, faithful life.
This is part of my ongoing series Beyond the Labels, where I’m sharing stories from women who are learning to embrace the fullness of who God has created them to be. Drop a comment to thank Samantha for her contribution!
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