Personally, I’ve struggled lately with any parenthood metaphor in preaching, blogs, or devotionals. I’m not a father, never have been, and at my age, there is a very strong likelihood that I will never be a father. So how am I to understand what is meant when someone at a men’s church breakfast uses a metaphor of fatherhood and I see all the other men around me nodding sagely because they understand what it’s like to have, love, and raise kids.
I find it heartbreaking that there’s a whole set of metaphors and examples in Scripture that I will probably never be able to fully understand because of my singleness and my childlessness. It makes me so sad that I can feel the tears welling up while I type this.
I’m so sorry!!! That sounds like a really difficult experience. I can definitely hear the pain in the tone of your message. Praying God’s comfort & peace meet you in this. It is interesting to think about how many of the metaphors in scripture we can’t directly relate to. One of my friends is an actual farmer and her experiences have helped me see more of God in a way I never would have on my own. My hope for community is to have this kind of sharing & communal faith, I think.
That’s true, but I feel that it’s limited by the differences between different kinds of metaphors.
One type are those that we could understand by having things explained to us, like your friend explaining how her work illuminates the particular spiritual principles that you’re talking about. So, a farmer could explain to someone without direct farming experience how the well-tilled soil in the parable of the sower is linked to farming practice. In this case, hard soil would present a barrier to the seeds so that they wouldn’t be able to germinate.
On the other hand, there are metaphors that we will understand only through direct experience. For instance, if you think back to the time before you had your children, I’m sure that your concept of absolute love would have been radically different from your perception of the same concept. People who are parents have said things to me like “I didn’t know what love really meant before I had my children”. A person has to go through the experience of having a child before they can truly understand what it means to be a parent. Someone has to be in a loving, reciprocal romantic relationship before they can fully comprehend Song of Songs. I’ve never had either experience, so I can, at best, have an abstract understanding of parental love from seeing the people in my small group interact with their children.
These metaphors are like sensory experiences. How would you be able to describe the differences between red, purple, and yellow to someone who has never seen colour?
I guess that, for me at least, a lot of the metaphors about love will be things that I cannot fully understand for a while longer. How much longer, I don’t know. But metaphors about parenthood and things like the requited love between the two lovers in Song of Songs are beyond my range of experiences. I’m not sure that anyone can understand those if they haven’t been there themselves.
As a mom of 4 littles and a writer trying to balance it all, this resonates! Love the beauty of your words and the encouragement weaved throughout. Thanks for sharing!
It’s called Unhurried: An Invitation to Slow Down, Create Margin, and Surrender Control to God. It’s my story of trying (and failing) to do it all, but more importantly, of God’s story and how He taught me about who He is and what it looks like to daily lay my plans aside and pursue His purposes. I’m so excited to release it into the world this April!
Thank you for asking :)! I’m new to Substack but have loved discovering amazing writers like yourself in the short time I’ve been here!
This was such a beautiful read. I find myself wondering how much motherhood will impact my life and creative expressions and if I’m welcome to the change.
Thank you for emphasizing that it’s okay to own your season and let it flow into your creativity.
I am SO excited to see your journey!! 🫶🏼🥹 Thank you for reading. I think a lot of it is just giving ourselves permission to change instead of resisting it.
Thinking of your fatherhood writer comment, I find it interesting how actors will talk about fatherhood and I’ll often see social commentary on how “they’re just using their children as a way to be more approachable to the public.”
Do people really think parenthood doesn’t absolutely change you?? I know the answer here because up until the day of birthing my daughter I assumed she would not in fact change me haha. It is even more change in motherhood than fatherhood. 😅
Yes Chanel!! I’m so glad you put your thoughts here as you’ve been writing & thinking about these things longer than I have! It is so interesting I have noticed that too. My husband and I have a lot of conversations about this, too. I actually read “morherhood” books before becoming a mom because I was always curious!
Thank you for your beautiful writing, Molly. I'm not a mother but I have a deep respect for those who are. Thank you for sharing your insight and connecting it to Biblical truth. I especially enjoyed your reflections about Mary, the mother of Jesus.
I think motherhood is one of the most beautiful, and most overlooked, things any woman can do. It's such a shame that society views it as niche when we literally all have mothers. Everyone should be interested in what mothers are experiencing, I think, because watching mother's at work gives so much insight into the human experience. I love writing about motherhood. And I loved reading this today, too x
You said this so well! I feel the same way! 🫶🏼 I had someone tell me once I couldn’t contribute to a conversation about motherhood before I had a baby and someone else stood up for me and said, “we all have mothers!” and I’ve loved that perspective ever since. 🥹🤍
Personally, I’ve struggled lately with any parenthood metaphor in preaching, blogs, or devotionals. I’m not a father, never have been, and at my age, there is a very strong likelihood that I will never be a father. So how am I to understand what is meant when someone at a men’s church breakfast uses a metaphor of fatherhood and I see all the other men around me nodding sagely because they understand what it’s like to have, love, and raise kids.
I find it heartbreaking that there’s a whole set of metaphors and examples in Scripture that I will probably never be able to fully understand because of my singleness and my childlessness. It makes me so sad that I can feel the tears welling up while I type this.
I’m so sorry!!! That sounds like a really difficult experience. I can definitely hear the pain in the tone of your message. Praying God’s comfort & peace meet you in this. It is interesting to think about how many of the metaphors in scripture we can’t directly relate to. One of my friends is an actual farmer and her experiences have helped me see more of God in a way I never would have on my own. My hope for community is to have this kind of sharing & communal faith, I think.
That’s true, but I feel that it’s limited by the differences between different kinds of metaphors.
One type are those that we could understand by having things explained to us, like your friend explaining how her work illuminates the particular spiritual principles that you’re talking about. So, a farmer could explain to someone without direct farming experience how the well-tilled soil in the parable of the sower is linked to farming practice. In this case, hard soil would present a barrier to the seeds so that they wouldn’t be able to germinate.
On the other hand, there are metaphors that we will understand only through direct experience. For instance, if you think back to the time before you had your children, I’m sure that your concept of absolute love would have been radically different from your perception of the same concept. People who are parents have said things to me like “I didn’t know what love really meant before I had my children”. A person has to go through the experience of having a child before they can truly understand what it means to be a parent. Someone has to be in a loving, reciprocal romantic relationship before they can fully comprehend Song of Songs. I’ve never had either experience, so I can, at best, have an abstract understanding of parental love from seeing the people in my small group interact with their children.
These metaphors are like sensory experiences. How would you be able to describe the differences between red, purple, and yellow to someone who has never seen colour?
Thank you for your prayers.
I guess that, for me at least, a lot of the metaphors about love will be things that I cannot fully understand for a while longer. How much longer, I don’t know. But metaphors about parenthood and things like the requited love between the two lovers in Song of Songs are beyond my range of experiences. I’m not sure that anyone can understand those if they haven’t been there themselves.
As a mom of 4 littles and a writer trying to balance it all, this resonates! Love the beauty of your words and the encouragement weaved throughout. Thanks for sharing!
Thank you Samantha! What is your upcoming book about?! I just saw in your bio!
It’s called Unhurried: An Invitation to Slow Down, Create Margin, and Surrender Control to God. It’s my story of trying (and failing) to do it all, but more importantly, of God’s story and how He taught me about who He is and what it looks like to daily lay my plans aside and pursue His purposes. I’m so excited to release it into the world this April!
Thank you for asking :)! I’m new to Substack but have loved discovering amazing writers like yourself in the short time I’ve been here!
Aw that sounds amazing Samantha!! Congrats 🎉 let me know if I can help in the launch in any way. Cheering you on 🫶🏼✨
Thank you so much ❤️! I definitely will!
This was such a beautiful read. I find myself wondering how much motherhood will impact my life and creative expressions and if I’m welcome to the change.
Thank you for emphasizing that it’s okay to own your season and let it flow into your creativity.
I am SO excited to see your journey!! 🫶🏼🥹 Thank you for reading. I think a lot of it is just giving ourselves permission to change instead of resisting it.
Thinking of your fatherhood writer comment, I find it interesting how actors will talk about fatherhood and I’ll often see social commentary on how “they’re just using their children as a way to be more approachable to the public.”
Do people really think parenthood doesn’t absolutely change you?? I know the answer here because up until the day of birthing my daughter I assumed she would not in fact change me haha. It is even more change in motherhood than fatherhood. 😅
Yes Chanel!! I’m so glad you put your thoughts here as you’ve been writing & thinking about these things longer than I have! It is so interesting I have noticed that too. My husband and I have a lot of conversations about this, too. I actually read “morherhood” books before becoming a mom because I was always curious!
Thank you for your beautiful writing, Molly. I'm not a mother but I have a deep respect for those who are. Thank you for sharing your insight and connecting it to Biblical truth. I especially enjoyed your reflections about Mary, the mother of Jesus.
Thanks Amber! I’m so glad you’re here 🤍🫶🏼✨ and thank you for these kind words!
Beautifully told truth 💕
I think motherhood is one of the most beautiful, and most overlooked, things any woman can do. It's such a shame that society views it as niche when we literally all have mothers. Everyone should be interested in what mothers are experiencing, I think, because watching mother's at work gives so much insight into the human experience. I love writing about motherhood. And I loved reading this today, too x
You said this so well! I feel the same way! 🫶🏼 I had someone tell me once I couldn’t contribute to a conversation about motherhood before I had a baby and someone else stood up for me and said, “we all have mothers!” and I’ve loved that perspective ever since. 🥹🤍
absolutely stunning! thank you for sharing.
Thank you for this sweet comment! 🤍🥹
this is a beautiful reflection!! i so appreciate the way you articulate your experience in a way that makes me ponder deeper the christian faith!!¨̮
You are such a blessing to me! 🤍🫶🏼🌿 I love how we have connected over faith & writing! You’re so encouraging it always makes my day
So thankful for the connection!