A lesson in God's delight over us

Learning to listen to God's voice and believe the good things he has to say

I don’t know when exactly it started. Maybe in some hormonal bliss caused by the happy hormones of feeding my son. Maybe in the joy of being home with him and wearing sweatpants on a cozy, rainy afternoon while watching him giggle and roll around on the floor. One day, I started saying to my son early and often, “I delight over you.”

One night my husband asked me about it. He said, “I’ve heard you tell our boy you delight over him so many times in the last few days.”

I had. In the quiet of our living room after bedtime my husband told me there was something really special about that. He wanted to hear more. What did I mean by it? Why did I say it? When did I say it for the first time? What motivates me to say it over and over again?

We started to debrief this sweet little family ritual I had unintentionally fallen into.

When I became a mom I fell absolutely head over heels in love with my son. But I also wanted to be careful. I didn’t want my language with him to cause him to think my love was dependent on his behavior or his mood. I didn’t want to label him as an “easy” or “happy” kid and have him one day feel like it was too much pressure to live up to that label or any other label for that matter. I didn’t want him to feel like expressing his true thoughts or feelings would shatter the world.

To avoid all that as best as I could as mom, I just want my son to know that I love him. Even more so, I wanted him to know that I like him. I like being around him. I like being near him. I like watching him learn and grow. I delight in him.

I delight over him when he’s falling asleep, when he’s eating, when he's cranky, when he’s just fallen over (again), when he’s coughing and sneezing and up in the middle of the night. I whisper over and over again—I delight over you.

He doesn’t have to show up any certain way to earn my delight. My delight is just there in the simple act of getting to know and witness him.

I hope as you’re reading this, this sense of delight feels familiar to you.

Not just as something you have experienced yourself in watching a child or someone you love but I hope you recognize the feeling of being delighted in. Because if you look up for a moment and pay attention, God is looking down delighting over you.

"We are built to live in the kingdom of God and to experience it as our native land, where we are welcomed, accepted, and delighted in." -Dallas Willard

A stranger asked about what I did for work. I fumbled an answer. I have a podcast. I’m a writer. But most days if you peeked through my window—I’m a stay at home mom. I’m a weird hybrid in-between kind of mom and often I don’t really feel like I have a place. I have zero interest in being a full-time homemaker but I’m not really trying to make a career with an income out of my creative pursuits. So where do I land? I don’t know. How do I share this in small talk? No idea.

Later, I was walking around the neighborhood pushing the stroller. In this mundane trying-to-make-it-to-nap-time ritual I felt God smiling down on us saying, I delight over you.

I wasn’t doing anything profound. I wasn’t working very hard. I wasn’t explicitly praying. I wasn’t trying to connect with God in any intentional way but I just felt God there—happy to see me and to know me.

And the craziest part?

I have the audacity to actually believe him.

I have no idea what my son’s life will hold. I don’t know what my life will hold. And I know that he won’t remember any of the words I say right now. But I do hope there is a gentle inner guiding voice that he grows up knowing—the voice of a God who loves us and likes us, who actually wants to be around us even when we feel like we have nothing to offer.

"The real 'work' of prayer is to become silent and listen to the voice that says good things about me... it’s not easy to let the voice of God’s blessing speak to the center of my being."

-Henri Nouwen